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tupacabra:

when my mom was pregnant she would put a walkman up to her stomach and play cher’s greatest hits and she apologizes for it every day because she thinks that’s what made me gay

illegolas:

why is a girl smoking considered soft grunge

why is anything considered soft grunge

what is soft grunge

ectoproctologist:

timothydelaghetto:

defuzzification:

entertainingwealthybitches:

90sdefect:

ghdos:

the4mat:

andross:

Are people really mad about Leonardo DiCaprio saying nigga in Djago?

He was playing a slave owner in the South during the mid-1800’s.

The hell you want him to say?

“young black man”

“African American chap”

“Young Brutha”

“beautiful chocolate fellows”

“Nutella flavored Mandingo warrior”

“Old sport”

pontmercyanide:

some flowers just arrived for my sister but my mom thought they were for me.

and so she asked if they were from henry and of course i asked what the hell she was talking about

and she was like “henry, the boy you’re always talking about.”

she meant henry david thoreau.

i quote henry david thoreau so much my mom thought henry david thoreau was my boyfriend

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ethiopienne:

yeah boys are cool but have you ever had stuffed crust pizza

fruitpacks:

yolotov-cocktail:

fruitpacks:

*snorts pollen* i love nature

You know pollen is plant sperm right

even better

vvorldwideweb:

people who can pull off an ugly face and still look 10/10 attractive are the reason why i cry at night

yourfiancebeyonce:

my mom posted this on my facebook wall because i dont want to go to the zoo with her

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bekn:

in my family i’m the ‘computer whiz’ cause i understand that when u open a new window the previous one isn’t gone